This is my birthday week, which is likely why I’ve been craving Champagne, my favorite thing to drink in times of celebration. The best way to kick off a celebration of any sort is a toast. While toasting as a social drinking activity is almost always a good idea, obviously some toasts are more appropriate in certain situations than others. In my experience, toasts start off nice, usually witty, and become more sentimental or raunchy as the night continues, predictably melding into some amusing hybrid of the two.
What follows are some toasts I’ve picked up or overheard at dinners and parties. Feel free to add any of these to your party-going toolkit to impress, amuse, or occasionally embarrass your friends and family!
May friendship, like wine, improve as time advances. And may we always have old wine, old friends, and young cares.
May you always have a clean shirt, a clear conscience and enough money in your pocket to buy a glass of Pinot Noir…on your birthday and every day!
Cool, friendly, clever, handsome… but enough about me. Here’s a birthday toast to you!
There’re big ships, there’re small ships, there’re ships that sail the sea. But the best ships are friendships, and may they always be!
Champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends!
I used to know a clever toast, But now I cannot think of it. So fill your glass to anything, And bless your souls, I’ll drink it!
May we get what we want, but never what we deserve.
Here’s to those who’ve seen us at our best and seen us at our worst, and can’t tell the difference!
May all your ups and downs be between the sheets!
Here’s to the floor, who will hold you when no one else will. But don’t forget your hands—you’ve always been able to count on them!
I drank to your health in company, I drank to your health alone. I drank to your health so many times…I nearly ruined my own!
And because no good night of wine is complete without a little bit of poetry, here’s a favorite by Yeats:
“Wine comes in at the mouth
And love comes in at the eye;
That’s all that we will know for truth
Before we grow old and die.
I lift the glass to my mouth,
I look at you and I sigh.”